The Trials and Tribulations of the not-so-New Bear Icon

I get a few polls emailed to me now and again. One of them always asks the same control questions at the end of the survey. The question asked is: "Do you consider yourself to be mostly a resident of your city or town, America, or the planet Earth?"

The question is asked to be able to discern your outlook, how you frame things. A worldly person would see, and probably obtain news differently from someone who is more city-focused.

I have to say, I don't know exactly how to answer the question. I mean obviously I'm all three, but I can't say for sure what my outlook is best described as. I'd also like to add that I'm a resident of my state. It might not mean much to others, but Texas is it's own little world.

As for getting information, I'm not very city-foucused. I sometimes pick up the Dallas Morning news, especially if a copy has been left out in the cafeteria at work, but I don't make a habit of going online for it, same with the Fort Worth Star Telegram. I still watch the Houston Chronicle more, and could tell you more about the news there than here.

I take a look at the national news, focusing more on the political and entertainment stories, but am I happy to call myself an American? I'm much more likely to introduce myself as a Texan, which, with the current president may not really help. As for being worldly, well, I certainly don't know enough about it to truly be a global citizen.

I guess I'm a citizen of all, but not really subscribing to the viewpoint of any of them.

Of course, the questionnaire goes on to ask if I'm a Wal-Mart shopper, or a NASCAR fan. The answer to both is most assuredly no, so that does put me in another category, I'm sure. They always ask about religion and passports, also to see a little bit more about you.

One other question I see every time is "Are you a member of the investor class?" Again, this would be no. I may work for the industry, but the only investing I do is moving a few funds around in my 401(k). I know, it's another world-view question. If you have the ability to invest, you certainly don't see the world the way someone who'd having a harder time making ends meet would, but I just find the wording of the question rather odd.

Perhaps it is the problem of seeing the word "class" used for this, where you'd like to think that being an investor wouldn't make you different from others. It isn't true, but it seems that being a part of such an "investor class" is getting farther and farther away from the middle class. It seems to infer that you're talking about an upper class only, those who wouldn't shop at Wal-Mart I guess.

Hmm, what am I doing with my money?

I'm a little upset that I didn't get tickets to go see The Police in concert. Tickets went on sale this past Saturday and while I was at work, actually working, I forgot to log on and slog through the site to order tickets. There's also that thing about a concert in late June that kind of makes me forgetful about it on a day in March.

By the time I remember that they had gone on sale, it was Sunday morning and the first show was sold out. In a 20,000 seat arena. And they added a second show. And it had SOLD OUT as well! I was actually kind of stunned. I didn't think that the police were thought of so fondly, and I didn't think they'd get such a response since a). those who want to see Sting with a lute would be disappointed, and b). most people under 30 have never heard of the group since they broke up in 1986.

I then decided to take a look on the secondary market, and there were all of the tickets. Ticket speculation is just as big of a market as PS3 resales were - for about a week. Something tells me that if you can get tickets to shows easily, you could make a good living on the resales of those tickets.

I didn't need good seats, I just wanted to be there, but when the furthest seat in the arena was now going for twice the original $50 selling price, I decided that this was a concert event I was just going to have to miss. It's sad in a way, but then again I have seen The Police before. It was my first concert, and the first one that my parents let me got into Houston for. that was the 1984 Synchronicity tour and it was at the Summit - now Lakewood Church. Sting wore the big red, yellow and blue outfit from the Synchronicity II video. Ahh, those were the days.

I really have better things to spend my money on, but it would have been fun to see the same group...several years older. perhaps they will come again. Heck, the Stones still tour.

Personally, I'm looking forward to more new acts, like seeing the Scissor Sisters next week!

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Otherwise, my friend Jerry (goofycubb) sent me some questions to answer...

1. Do you miss Houston? Me? :) LOL

I'm finding hard to believe that it's been almost a year since I was last in Houston. My parents worry about me!
I don't miss the city so much, but there are a few places - namely Beck's Prime and James Coney Island. I also miss the ripcord and wish I could move all of those places up here. I also miss driving on Memorial Drive. As for you, I really wish you were here to watch the Amazing Race with! Or just to hang with. Those were good times. When are you coming to visit us? :-)

2. Will you ever go clean shaven again?

Well, most people who know me these days have never seen me clean shaven. I think the last time was 1994, and i have no plans to do it again.

3. What is the strangest thing that someone has said while you are in bed making whoopee?

Generally I'm the one who comes up with the bad puns and such! I guess it was the mutually crazy conversation about Bears releasing genetically enhanced pheromones on a dance floor, triggered by thumping dance music. It was at TBRU, and the sound created for this - "Paaaft!" -became a catchphrase for the weekend.

Let's just say that mixing the two of us in bed was not only fun, but also a lesson in non-sequitur thinking.

4. What is under your bed?

Occasionally Joey, but otherwise it's the surge protector outlet strip that powers the CPAP.

5. Did your mom ever catch you masturbating?

Thankfully no, thanks to a lock on the door, but occasionally she did try to open the lock with a coat-hanger. This would normally be when she was mad at me for something. I'm not so sure what she would have done if she caught me with a Muscle and Fitness magazine in one hand...

I still follow Houston news, partially because I like the Houston Chronicle better than the Dallas Morning News or the Ft. Worth Star-Telegram. The other reason is that the Chronicle puts all of their comic strips on line (except for Sundays), so I usually read those at work, then skip over to the news part of their website. i can tell you about plaenty of things going on in houston, while I'm more oblivious to goings on here.

So I noticed that the Houston Dynamos won the Major League Soccer Cup over the weekend. I learn this from the Houston paper, but the event happened in the Dallas suburb of Frisco. It's really unimportant, but the Championship game was going on just a few miles away, but I have to learn about it from my old newspaper. Of course with the wonders of Technology, you never have to give up some things when you move.

I wrote about the Houston Dynamo a while back when they moved from San Jose to Houston. They had trouble finding a name, and when they thought they had one, it was seen as offensive to the Mexican-American population (they chose 1836 - the year the Texas defeated the Mexican army). Apparently the team was pretty good when they were in San jose, winning a couple of championships there. They moved because they couldn't attract a crowd.

Well, the games in Houston were watched by half full stadiums, too. While I'll guess that attendance will pick up now that they won a championship, I still think that they will have a hard time keeping an audience.

Look at our last championship team in Houston, no, not the Astros (they were NL champs a year ago, but lost the World Series). The Houston Comets won the first four championships in WNBA history and developed a good following. The last championship was in 2000. They go to the playoffs like clockwork, but their audience has dwindled and now they are up for sale.

Face it, the Dynamo's owners though that the hispanic population of Houston would be a natural crowd for soccer, but they'd much rather go to the games featuring visiting teams from Mexico. Those games are packed. Soccer games are filled with kids who play YMCA soccer and their parents. Perhaps they will eventually build an audience, but right now, they'll be fighting with the Comets and the minor league Houston Aeros hockey team for lowest attendance.

The Dynamos had a victory celebration in downtown Houston on Tuesday. They drew 600 people. this out of 4.5 million Houstonians. The Aeros drew more when they won the Calder Cup a few years back. Soccer in America is still very minor league.

Perhaps the Dallas Stars will do well enough to get noticed in the Houston paper. Otherwise, I'll never know.

Oh, and yes, I do know who won Dancing with the Stars. I'm sure I really didn't care, but still, it's interesting what people will watch, and what they'll actually vote for.

I’m listening to the new Dixie Chicks album, Taking the Long Way this morning as I’m here at work. It’s a really great album. Of course I was influenced into buying it because of the Chick’s political statements, and sort of “voting” with my purchase, but it really is a worthy album that won’t get any attention or praise from the mainstream country crowd.

There’s a lot of themes about loss on this album, loss of friends and support that stem from the choices one’s made. Of course there are many parallels that one could see to the Chick’s current situation, and I guess that’s good, write what you know as they say. Still, nothing is “hit you over the head” autobiographical, no “Ballad of Natalie Maines” though there is a anti-war song. Certainly the sound is a little less country, and more in tune with a general audience, as they know they’ll have to get sales from a more diverse crowd than that of your redneck crowd.

I know the Houston and Dallas stations (mostly Clear Channel controlled) have refused to play any Dixie Chicks music, but leave it to Austin to buck the trend. Give ‘em a few years, when this administration goes away, and people will likely forget.

Yes, I do feel that Natalie Maines’ statement that she takes back any apologies not only is for her sensibilities, but also to sell records, as it’s getting less risky to criticize the president these days.

I wish they were playing Austin City Limits Festival this fall. I’m also listening to Gomez’s How We Operate, and they are playing ACL, so that makes me happy!

Otherwise, I’m thinking about the fact that this was my last week as a leaseholder for my apartment in Houston. Although I turned in my keys back in February, I still had an actual lease, and rent payments until this month. Now it seems more that I don’t have a home there anymore, but it still feels like home, even though I have a great home here in Dallas.

Last night I was getting gas and a guy came up to me and asked me for some change. Normally I don’t give these guys money. It’s more of a thing that I don’t trust panhandlers, and think that there’s better ways for these folks to get help than panhandling.

Now this guy did seem to have his family, and a truck that, from what he said, lost a fan belt, so it was a bit of a different situation. Still, it wasn’t until he said, “I’m from Houston, and we’re just trying to get home,” did I finally decide to give up the two dollars I had in my pocket.

Of course, I rarely carry more than a couple of dollars in my pocket anymore, as I’m a firm believer in the debit card, but that’s just a little tangent.

I guess I still try to keep in touch with Houston a little bit, checking the Chronicle’s online website for news more than I check for news about Dallas. Of course I need my Astros updates, and it doesn’t hurt that the Chron has all of their comics available on line (except for Sundays).

I still send emails back and forth with my friend Hans, just like I used to in my old job, but now he’s often telling me about what’s going on in the city, or with the fraternity. I tend to tell him of my troubles in playing softball. I also get a few emails from my old team, telling me who else has left, or that someone has been promoted to fill the loss. I also missed watching The Amazing Race with Jerry this year. Go hippies!

I need to get back there soon and go see an Astros game, but now I’ll have to get a hotel room, or go stay with my parent’s in Conroe. I guess the bonus there is that I would get to sleep on the bed that was in my apartment. The negative is that that mattress probably should have been thrown out five years ago.

Perhaps it would be a little different had I moved farther away, like Chicago or Seattle or Boston, where the culture is different, as well as the seasons and the stores and restaurants. Dallas is still Texas, and the differences are minor. Still, I guess the homesickness would be more magnified, but there may have been more excitement, too. Some days I feel I just moved down the street.

I guess I’m hoping to carry on TV night because it’s a great way to have friends around. I’ve noticed that most of the people we hang around with are people Chris or Matty introduced me to, and while that’s not a negative thing, it’s not like I’ve exactly been making my own connections here. Then again I was mostly a loaner in Houston, too, so I guess it is good to have some one to introduce me to people, as I won’t normally do it on my own.

It’s interesting having someone else at home with you all the time. After living on my own for a few years, it’s nice to have someone to talk to, but also you have to change your mindset where it’s not all about you. Sometimes I have to think, can I watch this program, since Chris wants to see it too, or should I drink the last of the milk since Chris will probably want some for his cereal.

I find I still think like a bachelor at times, though. I haven’t learned how to grocery shop for anyone but myself (well, the fact that we’ve been eating out a lot hasn’t helped), nor have I been able to work on doing the laundry together, worried that I’ll mess something of his up, or won’t know where to put something away. I still can’t fold socks like he does. Still, I often wait for him to come home to go out to eat, and I’d rather eat with him than eat alone.

I guess I just need to keep easing into my new situation. It’s very different from anything I’ve ever done, so it more a reaction to change that makes me think about the old apartment. I miss it because it was a really nice apartment, with a nice view and decent location. Luckily Chris’ house is also well located to about everything but our jobs. It’s been a while since I’ve had a commute like this! What a waste of time!

Well, times up here at the old factory, so I guess I’ll be heading back home to enjoy the Memorial Day weekend. Enough of this rumination! There’s a pool party going on this afternoon, so I need to get in a good state of mind. I also need to decide how willing I am to pull off my shirt today, as I have a large bruise on the side of my gut from a botched Byetta (medicine) injection from a few days ago. Not that I’m self conscious, or anything!

A couple of days ago, Thursday to be exact, was Texas Independence Day. The day commemorates the day that the Texas rebels, now engaged in civil war with Mexico, signed their Declaration of Independence from Mexico. It is not, however, the actual finale of the skirmish with Mexico, as the US Revolutionary War kept going past "Independence Day", so did the Texan's war with the dictatorship of Santa Ana.

In similarity to the American Revolutionary war, the Texans, very different as American Ex-Patriots in northern Mexico colonies, felt that the leadership from far away Saltillo and Mexico City not only didn't respect their rights but also restricted the colonies growth. Mexico, already worried about the size of the anglo colonies wanted to crack down on the settlements and General Santa Ana himself, leader of the military that was ruling Mexico decided to take matters into his own hands.

It wasn't until the Battle of San Jacinto on April 19th, 170 years ago that the Texans finally found victory in sneaking around and finding Santa Ana taking a siesta on the plain that's now next to the Houston Ship Channel. The war ended not because the Texans were stronger, or were superior, they had lost many a man at the Alamo and other battles. They won because they broke the rules of warfare and attacked the Mexican camp when they weren't expecting it.

In fact, Santa Ana had to be brought to Texas General Sam Houston who had been wounded in the ankle earlier. Santa Ana was forced to end the campaign and take his army back to Mexico, and Texas became a republic for a few years before finally gaining statehood in 1846, but still, skirmishes between texas and Mexico continued until Mexico was finally defeated by the US in the Mexican-American War in 1848 that secured California and the southwest for the United States.

Still, somedays you wonder if the battle was ever over.

Just recently the city of Houston was given the San Jose Earthquakes, a Major League Soccer team that's expected to do better in the largely Hispanic Houston than it did in Silicon Valley. It will have a long way to go, as there are plenty of soccer fans in the city, but they are more attracted to the football teams in Mexico and Central America than they are in the American version of the sport. Several of those teams even visit Houston drawing large crowds for their exhibition games.

Of course the exhibition games are usually low priced, and played at several of the city's older stadiums, or at UH's Robertson stadium, which can be rented cheaply. Major League Soccer needs a permanent home, and one that's likely to cost, since the sweetheart deals the Astros, Texans and Rockets got are probably not going to be available to an upstart team that half the city 's population won't care about. Heck, the support for the Comets (Women's Basketball) went down dramatically when they stopped winning championships, hockey has never taken off as the Aeros have been in three different leagues, and Houston's outdoor and indoor soccer teams (the Hurricanes and the Hotshots, among others) never gotten much traction.

one might think it would be good to have a stadium in east Houston to try to engage Hispanic fans, and the land is cheap, but unless ticket prices are also cheap, it isn't likely to work, so I'm sure the new Houston team will have to do what the FC Dallas (formerly the Dallas Burn) has done, find a suburb with soccer-crazed kid population and hope it works. A few years at Dallas' Fair Park proved futile, and the ticket buyers were the people from North Dallas, Plano and Frisco, not from the hispanic areas of town, so the team moved north to a new stadium in a growing suburb.

Unfortunately Houston is very large, and the satellite cities (such as Sugar Land, Katy and Conroe) are not really capable of taking on such a project. Houston also has a sports funding mechanism the other cities lack, so it's pretty much play ball with the big boys, or get relegated to a high school stadium. Of course the Astrodome, while too big, is still empty.

So how does this relate to the revolutionaries of days gone by? Well, when the team was looking for a name, they wanted something traditional that would remind people of the names of European and South american football clubs. The League has been looking to change the flashy names of it's past, like the Burn, into names more like Arsenal and Manchester United. The ownership team of the Houston Club chose the name "1836" - the year of the City of Houston's founding.

Just a note about that. Houston was founded in late August 1836 by two land speculators from New York who were eager to get in on the land rush in the newly minted country. Why they thought swamp land in the heat of August would make an attractive community, I have no idea, but to help sales they put out a flyer in many US cities to buy land in the city of Houston - a city that didn't exist, cleverly named for the war hero and first president. Houston was pumped up by developers then, and it still is today.

But 1836 is also the year of defeat for the Mexican Army, and the soccer club found themselves in hot water with some of the fans they were hoping to get. Apparently citizens of Houston who may have had ancestors at the battle, or just in Mexico in general took offense to the numerical moniker. The battle, long since over on the battlefield, apparently lives on, much like the US Civil war still seems to give some reason to be mad about losing the "War Betwixt the States".

History, is written by the winners, and Texas has gone on to be the wealthy neighbor to some of the poorest areas of Mexico, driving a cultural influx. Now with political activism and political correctness, even a 170 year old fight still smolders.

So the team announced their new name today, the Houston Dynamo. While neither the proposed or the current name really conjures up any greatness, it's interesting to see what will end up offending others, even when the intention was certainly not there. Sports teams are in the business of making money, not driving away potential customers. Still, many Houstonian's would have rather seen the NFL team named the Toros, rather than the bland Texans. Perhaps Texican's would have been more historically accurate and pleasing?

Still, a change is here in Texas as the majority in the state is now Hispanics. Just as the Anglo colonists came in and eventually took over, perhaps the future will reclaim Texas, if not for Mexico itself, for the people who descended from Santa Ana's army. He may get the last laugh after all.

So the first day of work today was so different from the last day of work on Friday.

The last day at AIM (I guess I can give their name now, since I'm not there anymore) was crazy, with lots of loose ends to tie up, my new boss finally having the revelation that he needed to learn a few things, and people coming up to tell me how much they would miss me.

I managed to wrap up as much as I could, and list out some of the things I'd never get to. Since most people trip out early on their last day, people were surprised I was still there at three, three thirty and four. We had one of our really rare items come in, so I got to teach the boss how to quality check it, much to the dismay of Zack who got an error for it.

I also had a chance to go to several other floors to say goodbye to people, including the cute cubby Brodie in Correspondence, and the good looking guys up in research. I guess I was on a good looking guy tour. Yep, I'm shallow sometimes.

So just before I was to leave, Risa wanted to sing to me. She's crazy and everyone knows it, and apparently she likes singing Boyz II Men's "End of the Road" to people who are leaving. Of course, she can't sing. I told here to wait, while i went to the restroom, and while I was in there, I changed into my Utilikilt. This was important to me as I was always the one in meetings about the dress code, would always say that there was nothing against a kilt in the code. I would mention, on my last day, I would wear a kilt to work.

So I chickened out a little bit and brought it to work and changed just before I would leave. When I exited the restroom, Risa had gotten a whole crowd around her for the karaoke and you can imagine the surprised look on their faces and others when I came out in the kilt. Risa sang one verse and that was over. I then walked around to my desk, walking past the meetingroom where the Vice Presidents were. I heard later that the were questioning what i was wearing in their meeting. Gina came out of the meeting and had to get a couple of pictures before I walked out of the door.

I then went to the happy hour where Screaming Amy was. About 25 people showed up to send me off, some, like John, getting royally drunk. Still, it was a great night, warm enough to stay on the patio, and to still here the words "I hope to leave AIM soon" from just about everyone there. I told Amy of her nickname in this journal and she just laughed. she hopes to move to Denver in April. I hope she gets there, because I know she's miserable.

Now at the new job this morning, I woke up a little later than I expected, but there was little traffic the way that I was going, somewhat away from civilization, so I got there with time to spare. I was first taken to get a new name badge and get fingerprinted. Apparently I'm a very difficult person to fingerprint as it took a few times to get good prints. Those will go off for my background check.

I met my HR specialist who informed me that the training class I would be joining has been meeting for a week. Some of it is information I already knew, like "what's a mutual fund?" but other things, like how do I log into the system?, that I've missed, so I'm a little lost. Still, I know more about the financial industry that the whole of the class, so that makes me not feel so out of it. My old company kept coming up, especially as we talked about statements and we had an AIM statement come up. on that, i was an expert.

So i had lunch at the big cafeteria in the building, and if I want, I can join the company gym. Two perks we've never had in Houston. i guess I'll have to take advantage. It's looking really good, though, just a little new kid in town jitters.

It's the one, the only Screaming Amy, out at the happy hour that was held in the honor of my last day at work. About 25 people came to Berryhill in the beautiful weather to wish me off, oh, and to get drunk.

Well, the hours have already passed, and now it's officially after Schnitz's (alphaschnitz) birthday, so I'm a little late. I hope it was good, and he'll have moved into his new place soon.

I want to write something, I guess. I guess I'm posting in search of a topic, which is a bad place to be.

Well, there's a couple of nonsense trivia bits I can talk about. For one, i saw a map of all of the art on the university of Houston campus. While there's no real comparison between the UH campus, which looks as unplanned as most of the rest of Houston and Rice that took the actual effort to keep most of the buildings alike. You would never see a 60 year old tin shed on the rice campus.

Still, UH does go for some modern art on campus. One of the newer pieces, in front of the new school of music is some sort of bronze melting that's supposed to resemble a winged Nike but looks more like a chocolate easter bunny that has partially melted in the hot Texas sun. It's placed up high on a pedestal, but that just seems to make people want to dress it up even more. It's had band uniforms and dresses and other costumes from the near by theater.

There's also a statue in the Student Center that's a sort of crazed representation of a cougar (the UH mascot) attacking a pained Longhorn, and just about every other mascot of the old Southwest conference, including Horned Toads, Razorbacks, Owls, Ponies, Bears, and a little guy who I guess is an Aggie, or maybe a Red Raider. I'm not sure if I've ever seen anything more rah-rah on our normally apathetic campus.

Now, one of the newest installations on campus is a three story stainless steel blender. I guess it could be an hourglass of some sort, but really, it looks more like a blender, and probably is there to inspire smoothy purchases in the Rec. Center that it stands in front of.

One of the older ones is named Sandy in a Defined Space (or as we called it, Betty in a Box), and it's a raised box structure with a nude female figure sitting in to, with a leg stretched out of it. She's stuck at a normal person's reach, and she gets felt up often. You can tell because the patina has been worn down in certain areas. Sometimes she gets painted. Well parts of her.

Each new building on campus has to set aside one percent of it's budget to purchasing art. Sometimes it's good, often, it's just plain weird. The architecture building has two granite slabs that are carved into the shapes of couches. They aren't comfortable. I'm not sure if it's supposed to be art or a torture device.

Still, my favorite art pice at UH is an abstract metal set of boxes that sort of mess up your perspective. It's a forced perspective where it's not as deep as you would perceive looking at it. It was tough to draw in a art class I took one time. It's called Troika, but i have no idea why, since a Troika to me is a chariot that's propelled by three horses.

Occasionally I'll see a pice of art elsewhere. there's a couple of small pieces on the lawn outside the building I work at, but they are out dazzled by the light up deer that appear on the lawn each Christmas, but Houston isn't, as a whole, a big city for public art. It's a developer built city that doesn't think about devoting money for things like that.

Houston isn't a bad arts city, better than Dallas in ballet, theater, symphony, but there's never been a strong push for statues. In fact, I can't think of another statue besides the one in Herman park of a soldier (Sam Houston in this case), in the entire city. There's very little acknowledgments of wars in town, where others in the South would have Civil War heroes everywhere.

It's just not that kind of town. Trees, freeway overpasses, and buildings, little else.

You never know just how much junk you keep around until you start trying to pull it all out and throw it in boxes. The apartment is getting trashed, just to clean it up.

With the weekend's knowledge that I would be moving, I started to see the city in a different light, as if my eyes have to take in everything now trying to remember it all. I ended up taking a couple of extra drives around, and Friday's trip to the Ripcord was interesting since I was wondering how many of those people I would see again.

It's also making me think about stories of the city, and really I sort of stumbled across a memory of a really odd story in Houston's history, one that's almost been been forgotten, mainly because the city has moved on since then, and the Houston oilers are just a vague memory to many. Newer residents to Houston don't even know about the team, and maybe that's for the best. Of course, the Texans are doing very little to make Houstonians feel we have pro football at all.

Still, this odd memory goes back to 1993, where the Oilers were actually having one of the last good seasons they would have before they became lame ducks for the next two years and finally moved in disgrace to Tennessee. Just before the season ended, there was a strange news story that caught my eye, mainly because of the cute picture of player Jeff Alm.

Jeff had been a star offensive lineman, played at Noter Dame, and was quickly becoming a stand out player, but one night he had gone and killed himself with a shotgun on a freeway on ramp. He had apparently been distracted, lost control of the car, and his passenger had been ejected from the car, and fallen off the elevated ramp that went from Loop 610 to the Southwest Freeway.

The passenger had been listed as Alm's best friend, someone from his home, and was killed when Alm's car hit the side of the ramp, and the friend, who didn't have his seatbelt on, somehow was thrown out, fell several feet, and was killed. Alm, being distraught about killing his friend called 911, and while talking to the operator pulled the trigger of the shotgun, ending his life as well.

There were rumors that didn't make it into the paper. The rumor was that the friend was actually his boyfriend and he didn't have his safety belt on because he was taking care of business. Certainly a way for someone to lose control of the car. A rumor that went even further said that one of the reasons Alm shot himself was more than just the death of his friend, but that a real-life version of an especially painful moment from The World According To Garp had taken place.

I have no idea what the actual truth was. The news reports did seem to have holes in them, but as we know about the closeted life that a few gay athletes have talked about, it might have been true, and may have been another reason for Alm to take his life rather than deal with the questions. In the end, only the police and EMT's who were at the scene really know.

I guess why the whole thing caught my eye was the idea that this hunky football player could be gay, which was appealing to this closeted boy. I know that I had a dream that I could go back to that moment and help in some sort of way - either preventing the crash (unlikely) or talking to Alm before he pulled the trigger. I know it was part lust and part compassion, but it seemed a better resolution to a life than what became of Alm in the end.

I remember that there was a ceremony for Alm by the team, and then they went back to playing football. If memory serves, they lost the remaining games of that season, but as with other things, the memory goes.

i rarely use the ramp that Alm's friend fell from, and he himself died on, but i do go by that interchange often, and every once in a while that memory resurfaces for some unknown reason.

Just another story from the Bayou City.

I took some pictures of various places in Houston that were all ready for the holiday season. Lots of lights and a little tinsel, you know?

My Flickr page. which you can get with the link above, has more.