Feb. 16th, 2003

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Sunday morning, and I'm getting ready to go to work. A happy birthday greeting goes out to Troy, [livejournal.com profile] clovisbear. This is the validation day. We have to make sure that all of the data from the old system, has made it over to the new one. This would be Day 7 of DoHx12. Hours of looking over minutia. Yea!

Last night I had dinner with the Blands, the whole crew, including the kids. Marshall is fairly attached to me. He's also hyper as heck, fighting for attention. His little sister, Cheyenne, is a little princess. I know this situation all too well. John and Dawn make such great parents, but I can tell that Marshall's really been fighting them. Three year-olds. go fig.

I also had dinner with Hans on Friday night, so I guess that I was his Valentine's date. No, there's no trouble with AFFVC, Naima was out babysitting for another couple. I proceeded to tell my recent life story. Strangely, I'm figuring that I haven't juggled this many plates since college. February has been one interesting month.

Plate 1: Work. The plate that allows me to spin the other plates. The plate that's wobbling, due to the uncertainty of it all. Let's look at this, the web program that I've been working on that is designed to reduce head-count in my office. It's designed to have our clients by-pass our office and send their information and money directly into our computer systems.

Now remember that my team ended up unscathed by the last layoffs. Too important. I suspect there will be layoffs coming in July or so. Well, my team may have gotten a reprieve. That's when we have been chosen to solicit the web program to out clients. Phone calls telling them that they wouldn't need to deal with our sorry asses if they can trust sending data across the internet. We might be doing ourselves in, but we're doing it in style.

Plate 2: Friends. This one's on low heat right now. They're out there. Nothing much happening right now.

Plate 3: Family: tougher to judge. My sister wants me to go to Las Vegas with her and Ed in May. I'd like that. Mom and Dad are who they are. Once you've hit your sixties, there's not much change. Well, I take that back. My mother seems to be heading for the looney bin. She's obsessive-Compulsive and it seems to be getting worse. As if she wasn't annoying enough on her own. It's getting really sad, because she doesn't have a lot of social outlets, but this is of her own doing. she chooses to stay in and not work, or join a garden club or whatnot. She's loosing touch with reality, and my Dad - it's not that he's not a caring man, Dad doesn't really care anymore. the love left that marriage a long time ago, and it amazes me that they sleep in the same bed.

My father and I will have to have the talk that I've been putting off for a long time. That brings me to:

Plate 4: My big fat gay life. Ahh, the exploration plate. February has been an interesting month. There's been a lot of growth. Meeting new people, doing new things. Expressing myself differently. It's very thought provoking. I think I'm starting to break my closed-in suburban-life shell and seeing what's out there. LJ has been giving me quite the education. You wouldn't believe what the internet and a few weekend trips will do for you.

Yet, things already are uncertain there. There's been a great momentum the last few weeks. I don't know if it will continue at this pace. I doubt it will, but I have to continue to say that it's not a race.

I'm finding out that if I'm going to thrive in this new arena, I'm having to "come out" all over again. Intimidating. Just when you thought you had done it when you told your friends. Nope, I thought I had told myself. No, I hadn't. It was like saying I'm a tennis champion without lifting the racquet. Being gay in a bubble of your own making doesn't mean much. There will be more on this soon.

There's doors opening up, and I hope I'm smart enough to walk into the right ones.

Plate 6: Creativity. In development. Closed for renovation. Under construction. The part of my life I need to come back to.

Plate 6: The insular life. Home. When you live alone, this can be tedious. There's only so much TV and LJ you can do. Hence why creativity needs to be re-spun. Still, the apartment needs a good cleaning and tonight it's time for another episode of LAUNDRY: washing in the great outdoors.

Home life gives me way to long to think.

Plate 7: The future. Where am I going? There's no 5-year-program. No manifesto. No this is where I want to be by X. No great vision. This is lacking. I'm polishing up the resume, though. If anyone want's to hire a bear that has some knowledge of journalism, Radio and television production, theater, investments and retirement plans, let me know. Especially if it's in Texas. Still, the knowledge is not as deep as it should be in most of those subjects. Lack of experience in some of those areas makes it harder to fake out the interviewer.

The plates, most of them are spinning. Please cue the circus music.
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The Music Man

Tonight ABC is showing Matthew Broderick in a production of the musical, the Music man. As much as it pains me to miss the Simpson’s tonight, The Music Man holds a special place in my formerly thespian heart.

Trust me, I’ll be singing along with every song.

So, in this spirit, here comes a past times story. If you haven’t read DC’s Starman or JSA, you may not know what I speak of, but James Robinson, the writer, likes to take an issue or two to write a background story. Something the readers may not have known about the characters. This is such a story.

”PastTimes:TheMusicMan” )
Still, it’s my favorite musical.

Just another chapter as I was on my way to the big, 6’1” non-lisping, baritone-voiced guy I am now.

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