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My Baby Sent Me a Letter...
Dec. 6th, 2002 12:36 amOK, that's overstating things, but it makes a better subject line.
A few weeks ago (I'd link to the journal in question, but I haven't learned how!) I wrote that I had written to John T - my long-distance friend - a whole letter about how I felt about his recent visit. He, hadn't written back.
The whole big problem was that I asked where I thought our relationship was going. There's a bit of an awkward situation here. John T was a bit of a hard-liner when I worked on joining the fraternity - the first time - while he supported my joining the frat (something I wouldn't know till later) the frat still voted me down that year. This built some animosity between me and them at the time. I later joined the frat and was glad that I did.
Still, I'm still getting used to John T in a whole new way. Back then, I didn't know he was gay, he didn't know I was. We both heard from someone else later on. I didn't even know he was interested in me until a few months ago, and things sort of lead to the bedroom.
I'm a little inexperienced - if you hadn't guessed, especially in the "how do these gay relationships work?" thing. I got way way to far ahead, anticipating that something more might be coming from this relationship than it is. Yes, I asked if we were just friends, fuckbuddies, or is there something more (love?)
Whew! Too fast right? After a couple of months - long distance style? When I didn't hear anything, I panicked, thinking I'd offended him, and that the whole thing was over before it had ever gotten going,
Well, I got an e-mail back.
He says that love is way to much to be talking about - especially with the long-distance thing (buzzword of this post), but "more than friends, less than loves" is where we're sitting right now. He's been working (overnights) and finishing up his college classes for the year.
I'm thrilled. I didn't fuck it up. I think. This has taught me a lesson, and I'm growing. I truly don't know what will happen, or if anything will come of this, but it's exciting.
Now if he was here instead of Austin...that would be great. It's cold and I need some one to cuddle with.
(*laughs* because spell check doesn't know "fuckbuddy"!)
A few weeks ago (I'd link to the journal in question, but I haven't learned how!) I wrote that I had written to John T - my long-distance friend - a whole letter about how I felt about his recent visit. He, hadn't written back.
The whole big problem was that I asked where I thought our relationship was going. There's a bit of an awkward situation here. John T was a bit of a hard-liner when I worked on joining the fraternity - the first time - while he supported my joining the frat (something I wouldn't know till later) the frat still voted me down that year. This built some animosity between me and them at the time. I later joined the frat and was glad that I did.
Still, I'm still getting used to John T in a whole new way. Back then, I didn't know he was gay, he didn't know I was. We both heard from someone else later on. I didn't even know he was interested in me until a few months ago, and things sort of lead to the bedroom.
I'm a little inexperienced - if you hadn't guessed, especially in the "how do these gay relationships work?" thing. I got way way to far ahead, anticipating that something more might be coming from this relationship than it is. Yes, I asked if we were just friends, fuckbuddies, or is there something more (love?)
Whew! Too fast right? After a couple of months - long distance style? When I didn't hear anything, I panicked, thinking I'd offended him, and that the whole thing was over before it had ever gotten going,
Well, I got an e-mail back.
He says that love is way to much to be talking about - especially with the long-distance thing (buzzword of this post), but "more than friends, less than loves" is where we're sitting right now. He's been working (overnights) and finishing up his college classes for the year.
I'm thrilled. I didn't fuck it up. I think. This has taught me a lesson, and I'm growing. I truly don't know what will happen, or if anything will come of this, but it's exciting.
Now if he was here instead of Austin...that would be great. It's cold and I need some one to cuddle with.
(*laughs* because spell check doesn't know "fuckbuddy"!)
