Tuesday Randomness

[eggwards]

So Jay Leno will turn over the reigns to the Tonight Show to Conan O'Brien...in five years. *sigh* Jay Leno is so boring, and I never get to see Conan because our local NBC affiliate plays three hours of daytime talk shows, some of them reruns of stuff they ran earlier, then Conan around 2am. Anyone watching Leno here probably asked "who?" last night.

If I were Conan, I'd still shop around, but he did sign a new contract that assures him the Tonight Show spot. Conan reminds me more of Letterman in his heyday, unafraid, sometimes caustic, and creating oddball bits. Letterman, who I always thought should have taken over for Johnny Carson, has become a bit tired, but still better than Leno.

In other news, lots has been said about Sex in the City's Cynthia Nixon saying "no comment" to allegations that she is in a lesbian relationship. Of course she's going to get off a little easier than if a male actor took up with another guy. Also, after being on Sex in the City, there's certainly not much that would shock people.

The biggest thing for me is the stories that say she's crossed the line to the other side. So she's getting romantic with a woman...big deal, She's suddenly lesbian. Why can't she be bisexual? Why is it that someone must always be labeled one or the other?

Oh, and Texans, I'm looking to get a group to go to the Texas Renaissance Festival. I haven't picked a date yet, but it starts this weekend and goes on weekends through November 14th. I can't offer much in the ways of lodging, but It would be fun to take a big group! Let me know what you think!

Comments

[ericdabear.livejournal.com]

1.) Conan and Jay both have weak late-nite fu.

2) lesbianism vs. bisexuality. I can understand what you're saying but if she's chosen women instead of men then YES PLEASE say you're a lesbian. If you like both, say you're bisexual.

I just feel that the bisexual community AND the gay/lesbian community get a lot of problems when people go on the "Bi now, gay later!" program.

While I can understand the reasoning "hey, maybe my friends and family will only hate me a little if I'm half!" (pure horseshit).. it invalidates the actual orientations of others. I'd say only about 15% of people claiming to be bisexual really are.

[quirkstreet.livejournal.com]

The complicating factor is that a lot of first-timers don't know for sure whether they've "jumped the fence" forever, or just for that person, or half-and-half, or 70/30, or whatever.

Anne Heche went public about being in love with a woman about two seconds after meeting Ellen, Ellen waited years to come out ... but look how that turned out. Anne may be genuinely bi, but she's also a bit of a roller coaster ride. Ellen was closeted for a long time, but as an out lesbian, she seems WAY more stable.

For Cynthia to hold off on saying *anything* until she has time to settle into her relationship and put her focus on her partner and on figuring herself out, might be better for gays, lesbians, and bisexuals all around.

Also, I think you're right, some people feel they'll only be "half hated" if they identify as bi, but it IS horseshit. These days, most straights who have a problem will have a problem with ANYBODY who isn't straight. Bisexuality, to them, is just being gay but more promiscuous.

But if they're cool, they're more likely to validate a gay or lesbian person than a bisexual, because they've heard the same idea that bisexuals don't really mean it and are just playing games.

In the support groups we run in Boston, we hear over and over again from bisexuals whose straight friends turned on them and got nasty for not being "all the way gay." Many straights are quite threatened by bisexuality: it makes them wonder if they could go queer too, and that scares them.

[ericdabear.livejournal.com]

agreed. I think the best way to handle being unsure is to simply state that. "I'm unsure." Go, have a relationship, explore safely, sanely and respectfully. Don't wear a temporary tag (or what could only be a temporary tag)

It's a shame that homosexual people give bisexuals as much grief (if not moreso) as heterosexuals do. I think sometimes (not all) it's from a self-loathing. It's the approach from the opposite end of the spectrum ("At least they're half 'normal'"). Particularly from people who've had bad coming out experiences or background that heavily shun alternate orientations.

Hopefully we can continue to work toward "all honesty, all the time" in which people won't feel the need to take on labels before they're ready - or even take on no labels at all!

[quirkstreet.livejournal.com]

What a great answer. You rock.

Yeah, when a gay man or lesbian talks about bisexuals being "half normal" and then resents bisexuals, it just makes me SQUIRM. I know way too many fabulous gay men and lesbians to be patient with some kind of internalized "bisexuals must be resented for being almost normal" self-hatred b.s. EWWWWWWWW.

I reposted some of my comments in my own journal, quoting you for clarity. I hope I did your views justice. Thanks! I'd been itching for a reason to blab about the Cynthia Nixon thing.

[ericdabear.livejournal.com]

LOL ok :)

[eggwards.livejournal.com]

Ahh, it's good to get people talking, and thinking!

[polomex.livejournal.com]

I can't watch David. He just comes off as a creepy old guy... Kinda like that weird uncle who thinks he's funny.

Conan's better than either one of them, but I still miss Andy.

[quirkstreet.livejournal.com]

I heart you for asking the "could she be bisexual" question about Cynthia Nixon. I think time will tell. Meanwhile, YOU'RE fabulous. :-)

[eggwards.livejournal.com]

Thanks, anything to get you writing more!

Even though I find myself pretty far to the 6 on the kinsey scale, I see gay men who find some women attractive for more than just their shoes, and some straight guys have that drunken night or two...

I believe in bisexuals! I always wonder why it's always a full shift to the other side- why can't people think sexuality could be a bit more fluid?

I think a big problem with the labeling is Monogamy. Since most people assume that there's one person in someone's life that they would be attracted to, and be with, so therefore, they are in a straight, or a gay relationship. End of story. Bisexuality to many seems to imply sleeping around, and makes people uncomfortable, when in reality they may only be involved with one person, but find attraction in both sexes.

Lots of cultural baggage in sex, gender and sexuality that is only starting to change.

Oh, and Mr. Handsome, I'm going to drop this in your journal, too.

[darke.livejournal.com]

About the RenFair. Definitely in. Your best bet to get the bear contingent from SA's attention is to make a "planning post" here:

http://www.livejournal.com/community/sanantoniobears/

[dedos.livejournal.com]

A Ren Fest? You can't get enough of that kilt, eh? :D

As for being labeled a "lesbian" as opposed to bisexual, it's just a matter of semantics. It's not like she's doing anything particularly bisexual when she's eating out her girlfriend, ya know. :)

[jaybear.livejournal.com]

I would be interested in theory, but would need to know a date in advance, as I would have to do all sorts of work schedule rearrangement in order to attend.

[mikiedoggie.livejournal.com]

I think the Conan deal is great. I have never liked Leno, and thinik Conan is da bomb!

[jeffdintexas.livejournal.com]

Hey Mikie, HAB is planning on going to the Renn Fest this year. hope you go with us.. I have gone the past two years with some friends and had a great time. Hope you come along with us this year! keep in touch bud!

[xanaducub.livejournal.com]

Anyone who saw Sex And The City was aware that Miranda hair was a give-away.

I will love her no matter who she brings to bed. (over 18 and human please).

[bendawg.livejournal.com]

"The biggest thing for me is the stories that say she's crossed the line to the other side. So she's getting romantic with a woman...big deal, She's suddenly lesbian. Why can't she be bisexual? Why is it that someone must always be labeled one or the other?"

This makes my life more difficult every day. I have a gay boyfriend that doesn't seem to understand and I have no idea how the family would react to such a concept. Bisexuality doesn't seem to be perceived well...